The Harry Situation

To Review:

My wife and I were the show creators. We were attempting to make an elevated comedy that didn’t provide easy conclusions, contrived endings or rapid-fire jokes at the expense of quality storytelling.

It was intelligent, funny, and would have been the very first show of its kind because it would contain adult sexual situations, and explicit scenes of lovemaking of all kinds.

However, our sponsor took this show and turned it into a painful, protracted commercial for something called “Power Putty”.

But here’s the beautiful part:

Like I said, I signed a contract to produce content, and I am using this blog as the legal means by which I fulfill this contract…

Well guess what?

Garnier Fructis also signed this contract. And as the sponsor of my content…

So, according to this contract, Garnier Fructis Bold It! MUST run ads to promote this blog.

I plan to fulfill my end of the agreement. I will create/produce/write 10 weeks of content and distribute it all on this site. And I challenge you, GFSBIEG&PP, to fulfill your end of the contract.

You don’t advertise this site = I win. You’re in breach and I sue.

You do run ads = I win. Because you’ll be driving a giant audience to a site that outlines all the things you’ve done to destroy the show, my family, my career, my reputation, my life and finally my accountant who sided with my wife today. (The only thing I got out of this adventure is the gift box of Bold It! you sent me in the early days – and I want to thank you for it, because my year’s supply of sexy hairstyles will make me the hottest homeless man under the overpass!)

So it’s totally up to you, oh revered sponsor. I suggest you run some ads!

You probably came to this site for one of two reasons:

1) You heard about the upcoming release of the super-controversial and sexually risqué new TV show called The Harry Situation, and wanted to see what all the fuss was about.

2) You read about some of the legal proceedings regarding the show, the cast, and the sponsor - and you’re the kind of person who can’t resist watching a trainwreck.

So first: is this site going to be exactly what you expected? No.

Will you still get to see the controversial show, backstage footage, interviews, AND get a front row seat for the trainwreck? Yes. You’re damn right you will.

It just might come in a different package than you imagined. Whether the network and the sponsor like it or not, I own this URL, and I plan on telling the story my way.

So who am I? A former nice guy, and college professor named Todd Gruyere. I am also the accidental creator of The Harry Situation - the magical mystical minefield of misogyny that helped me lose my career, my family, my dignity; and earlier today, my attorneys, who strongly advised me not to publish this blog.

Screw them too.

So why am I so angry? Because my wife and I actually wrote a great show. The show was funny, smart, and took three hard years to write. It was going to air on the most critically credible cable network ever to air boxing and a mob show. Then this “prestigious” network backed out on all of their promises and unceremoniously dropped the show. They subsequently pawned it off on a low rent three-letter broadcast network named after an animal, which in turn secured a sponsor and proceeded to “develop” my show into something I can’t even recognize as my own. It went from being a sex comedy for blue-state big brains into…well…ugh.

Judge for yourself. Here’s the intro to their show. Ok, so it’s kind of funny, or cute” as they say in the suburbs and the flyover states. But smart? No.

Originally, my wife and I wrote a very funny and smart show about a complicated character in the midst of a realistic and overwhelming sexual awakening.

So who the hell would ever want to change it into a show about a one-dimensional ‘loser’ who finally gets laid because he starts using hair gel?

Certainly not our sponsor. Especially since they agreed not to interfere with any creative decisions. They swore they would never insert their product into the show (or me).

So how did it come to this:

Can you believe it? From High Art to Hair Glue and Hooters. This was going to be the highlight of my professional career. But instead of doing something I believed in, I ended up creating the exact thing I was trying to avoid: an ‘edgy’* comedy filled with sex jokes and tight bodies that would somehow score through the roof with 18-24 year old boys:

*Edgy is the mysterious, dark opposite of the word “cute” in the magical world of suburban crackers.

That’s right - this thing could be a huge hit! It is also a huge leap backward for humanity. But the coveted ‘target audience’? They love it. They laugh. Everyone who has seen this thing laughs. That this might end up being a successful show is a painful truth that I’ll have to struggle with for the rest of my pathetic life.

The filming of this show undid my marriage, and left a wake of destruction and litigation that will not be settled for years to come.

You may have heard rumors, and think you know what happened. But you don’t. Come with me, I’ll be your cruise director on this boat trip through HELL.

And I was one of the lucky ones. My soul was crushed. Others barely escaped with their lives.

Ouch! More on that later. Whatever you’ve heard, though, the key phrase from me is: NOT GUILTY.

So put on your seatbelt. In the next 10 weeks you will see the story of The Harry Situation from its grand beginnings through to its miserable, agonizing, ongoing death.

Why 10 weeks? Because that will fulfill the remainder of my contract:

For the next 10 weeks, I plan to give you something much better than a vapid, offensive television program.

I will take you on a journey where a family man and humble artist is slowly and painfully corrupted by promises of fame and fortune - a simple trip where good intentions, nice people, and a great idea are ruined by Hollywood attorneys, advertising leeches, and New York shampoo shills. You will see a man, who formerly advocated concepts such as creative integrity and artistic vision, reduced to parroting advertising industry idiotisms like “branded content” and “product placement”. YES!

This has been the absolute worst experience of my life; I am financially broke and psychologically broken. But whaddayoucare? You were promised a comedy.

So enjoy the show.

And don’t forget: This is all brought to by Garnier Fructis Style Bold It! Endurance Gel and Power Putty. (I didn’t make up those names. They did.)

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